Honey Garlic Miami Ribs: The Musical

This blog is dedicated to my Israeli nephew, Noam, on the occasion of his engagement to his beloved, Hadara.

The curtain rises. A fiddler is sitting on top of the roof of a little house in a European shtetl. Music.

(Barbara)
Honey Garlic Miami Ribs. Sounds crazy, no? But in our little home in Thornhill, you might say every one of us loves Miami Ribs, trying to eat as many of the yummy, sweet and tender morsels as possible without overeating. It isn't easy. You may ask, what's so special about them? It's because they are connected with so many wonderful, happy occasions..And why must they be served with green beans and rice? That I can tell you in one word...Tradition.

(Chorus)
Tradition, Honey Garlic Ribs, tradition
Tradition, Yummy ribs, tradition

(Barbara)
Because of this tradition, I've kept my butcher busy for many, many years. Here in Greater Toronto, Miami Ribs (aka Short ribs for some of you) are not always so easy to come by....sometimes it's the wrong day of the week, sometimes there were none on the delivery truck, sometimes even, it's too near a yom tov. For instance, once, when it was between Yom Kippur and Sukkot, at the last minute the family from Israel decided to come. I ALWAYS serve them Miami Ribs, so I called the butcher in a panic, but he said that he hadn't received his order....but then, miraculously he called, telling me that he had managed to find some for me....This shows my constant devotion to my butcher. You may ask, how did this tradition start? I'll tell you--I don't know. No wait, I do! I used to eat them at a favourite restaurant when I was a little girl, and I loved them. So I served them in my own home, and then my children loved them. Now, it's a tradition....Because of our traditions, my butcher knows that when the relatives are coming, we'll expect him to have some on hand for us.

(Barbara)
Who day and night
Must scramble for some short ribs
To feed the fam and children
And any other guests
And who has to drive
Out to the kosher butcher
So there will be enough for all?

(All)
This blogger, this blogger...tradition
This blogger, this blogger...tradition

(Barbara)
You must know the way to make it properly
You fry them first, 'til tenderly (it has to rhyme...give me a break!)
Then you drain the fat and add the VH Sauce
And cook and baste until they're nice and done

(All)
VH Sauce, VH Sauce....tradition
VH Sauce, VH Sauce....tradition

(My kids)
At three I used to cut them up
At ten I licked the plate
I like to dip green beans in them
I hope....they're crunchy

(All)
The children, the children....tradition
The children, the children....tradition

(The Butcher)
And who will sell the ribs
In small shops in the 'burbs?
Withholding them from one-offs
For faithful customers?

(All)
The Butcher, the Butcher...tradition
The Butcher, the Butcher...tradition

(Barbara)
And among ourselves, we get along perfectly well. Of course, there was the time when she insisted that ribs be eaten with the rice and he liked them plain, but that's all settled now. Now we live in simple peace and harmony and....

(Daughter)
Eat them with the rice!

(Son)
Just the ribs!

(Chorus)
Rice!
Ribs!
Rice!
Ribs!

Tradition, Honey Garlic Ribs, tradition!
Tradition, yummy ribs, tradition!

(Barbara)
Miami Ribs. Without this tradition, our lives would be as corny as....as a Food-ler writing spoofs!